Charlton Heston

Like Redbeard, I really hope his funeral is open-casket, so that the pallbearers can pry his rifle from his cold, dead hands.
Tastelessness aside, he was a truly epic actor, the kind who could pull off movies as hilariously grandiose as Ben-Hur, The Ten Commandments and Planet of the Apes without batting an eye. Some of his other roles were more questionable, like when the good people at Universal Studios thought he was a logical choice to play the Mexican protagonist of Touch of Evil. Sure, his politics were horrendous, and few did more than he to contribute to the rise of the gun culture in the 1990s, but on the day of his death, let’s put that aside and remember the man who gave us such memorable exclamations as, “Let my people go!”, “Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!”, and, of course, “Soylent Green is people!” Most of all, let us remember the man who paved the way for Troy McClure’s virtuosic performance in Stop the Planet of the Apes, I Want to Get Off!:

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